Love and Sex

This post may contain graphic content considered offensive by some of you. Parental guidance is advised ...

So, advise to the wise from the wise lol , Never sleep with a person you are in love with!! No that came out wrong...more like never sleep with someone for the first time after you have fallen in love with them. Unconventional? think about it .....if he makes your heart skip a beat and distorts your breathing rhythm every time he walks by oh, and every time he touches you your stomach turns into a butterfly zoo, then what happens when he actually puts his *you know what* in your *you know what*? Heart attack? Death?

.All am saying is, it is not worth the risk.....
Not to mention the pressure that comes with it, performance is no longer one sided in this generation. Ladies also wanna put it down like its your freaking birthday and own your ass! My advice ? fuck him first then figure out the love thing later, and if you have already fallen for the Nigga ...DON'T DO IT! seriously though, do not! Friend zone his ass. Otherwise you'll just end up a love sick puppy, obsessed and wrecked.

You are all welcome!! xoxo

Today

Today i will avoid talking about shit in my life and concentrate on the positive. Like my friends who i love to death and my family all of whom i care for deeply not to forget my amazing Man who is the major reason for my existence.

I will no longer dwell on people who do not add value to my life, i will learn to walk away cause i know am worth so much more and i realize i cannot turn evil people into good people. I know i have a high level of tolerance but I am not a miracle worker.

Today i learn not to sugar coat things ,to call a spade a spade and not a big spoon, to differentiate friendly teases from emotional abuse. To identify love in a heap of lust.

Today i open a new chapter in my life. a chapter filled with laughter joy and happiness. Today, i honor Kate and the people in Kate's life. I would be nothing without you guys.

Hope you all enjoy your weekends. My plan? Eat as much junk food as i can lay my hands on, go out with a few friends, you know, the usual. oh! am probably getting a tattoo this weekend...will update you on how that goes down!!
xoxo

Dysfunctional

They say a real relationship or rather friendship begins after your first argument, cause then you get to to see and experience the ugly side of a person. From that you can make up your mind on whether you are willing to overlook the ugly and let them into your life.
This weekend i went out with a certain "friend" of mine. I say friend in quotes cause even i don't know how to describe our relationship. It is complicated i guess, we try to reel each other emotionally in only to destroy and wreck whoever gets a little bit attached. To say the least it is dysfunctional and unhealthy. I know we've all been there!
So we are driving through Westlands and we get in a fight and the guy decides he wants to kick me out of his car,(he's got this mean streak going on)....it's in the middle of the night,we are on a street i do not recognize and am dressed in a little slutty dress (i do not feel very creative today so i wont waste time trying to paint a mental picture)....therefore, see below pic

...all this time am thinking, there is no way in hell am getting out of this car! dressed like that i was probably going to get mugged and raped or best case scenario get arrested by cops thinking am a prostitute! You think that's far fetched? Get this, two of my friends got arrested one time under similar circumstances they are lucky it did not end up in their records! LOL
Back to that depressing story.... I sat there really quiet and hating myself for leaving the house in the first place, contrary to what most of you think of me, am a pretty soft and squishy person on the inside, wearing a tough face is just survival mechanism. I kinda broke down crying which is a little bit embarrassing but who can blame me?
Anyway he later apologized but i still think he should be marched through the streets and have people throw rotten tomatoes and fruits at him, .......

well, a girl can only dream i guess!!









The rest of the evening turned out pretty great by the way, i had a perfect excuse to get drunk! and who knew drinking at a parking lot could actually be fun? Too bad am quitting alcohol, i know it sounds cliche but i plan on following through with it...twelve steps and all. I have come to realize that most of my drama is alcohol related and i need a drama free life. Call it maturity.

Prince Charming

There comes a certain time in every woman s life when everyone is up on your neck about Marriage. Ladies you probably know what am talking about. I would like to think of myself as a little too young for that but my mum and aunt think different. The first time i told them i was working at the airport, their reactions were "Nice so when are you bringing your pilot boyfriend home?" NO! i do not unbutton my shirt every time a plane touches down and flirt with the captain. 

Not to forget the time i was joining university in Eldoret and they were so sure my children would be amazing runners! get it? 

You know what, chances are i will end up getting married to a teacher, someone i can see every single day and get three whole months a year to just hang in the house with. Or maybe it will be a drug lord....LOL you know how it is, one can never be so sure with this things.

For now, am just waiting to see which one turns into my prince charming....

CRUSH

How do you get over a crush? Okay i know its a pretty stupid question to pose but still.... a friend of mine, lets call her X has a mega crush on a dude she works with. she goes on and on about how cool he is ooh his lips,  blah blah blah showing everyone his pictures so we can join in the drooling and i can assure you its getting kinda old . 

My solution,

Step 1.

 Take a really bad picture of the dude, it doesn't matter how pretty we are, we are all bound to take bad pictures sometimes! So go for it, one where he probably looks drunk...something that looks a little like this.....or worse if you can manage.

Step 2.

Keep staring at it the whole day zooming in on all the worst areas captured until they stick in your head. This will aid in the third and final step....

Step 3.

Let the images haunt you in your sleep...do not fight off the nightmares! Let them eat you up and destroy you completely.

And Just like that you are healed off your crush! 

You are all welcome. 

Happy labour day!(to those of you that work) and the rest of you can have a great thursday.

xoxo everyone!